Now, before you label me as gullible, I never (as in since birth) believed in Santa Clause. Or the Easter Bunny. Or the--well, you get the point. I am not easy to trick. I am not dumb.
There are just some things that hit me (at profound and remarkable times) and strike me as surprising. Even though I might have KNOWN it, I had never REALIZED that I knew it.
And it wasn't until a few months ago that I REALIZED my dead goldfish just die. No swimming out to the ocean to rejoin their friends. They went into a septic tank to join millions of bacteria cells.
And so, when these profound and remarkable events hit me, I have a tendency to let whoever-is -standing-near-me know of my extreme insight. And they, well, they look at me like I have no brain at all. REALLY, they are just in awe that they, in their moments of insight, had never realized this either. But they PRETEND like I am dumb, and I remain with my mouth agape thinking, "WHY are they not finding this amazing?!"
So, my blog readers, I am here to tell you, goldfish do not swim back into the ocean once they die. Tragic, huh?
My reasoning for coming to this conclusion, however, was NOT that a goldfish of mine died. It was the following:
If Santa isn't true, and the Easter Bunny isn't true, and the Tooth Fairy isn't true, what else are we lying to our poor children about?
My answer:
Goldfish DON'T swim back to the ocean when they die and we put them in the toilet! A septic tank is on the other end of that flush! Gasp!
Seriously. They don't. And this makes me wonder. We lie to them about so many things (Santa, Easter Bunny, dead goldfish). And we are insanely surprised and angry when we catch them telling lies.
Um. Hello! We (adults) are not exactly taking home the cookie for "smartest in class".
Sponsored by the Tell Your Kid The Truth Campaign (for those who are still cookie-less, I made that campaign name up...)
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